Overheard

I may have spoken about the fact that our little girl is on Neocate formula. I'm not sure, however, that I've discussed just how it effects our household. So, I give you "Overheard"

me:  Oh Allie!  Whoooooa!  *makes the "nose-being-burnt" gesticulation*

Oh God... Oh God, ok, I'll take her in. She totally pooped.  Oh Jesus.

Code Blue in Aisle Three!! Assist, Assist! (The Monster had pooped on Poop, it came out like soft serve icecream  from one of those Asian buffet places, um, if soft serve came in colors of forest green and smelled like the Bog of Eternal Stench).

*husband enters room flailing and trying to cover nose and mouth, gagging.

Did you empty the Diaper Genie?  Can you hold her feet, Oh God, she has it on her feet, she's eating her feet. OH MY GOD...

DID YOU EMPTY THE DIAPER GENIE? JESUS, HELP ME HERE?

The Husband:  I think I did, didn't I?  Oh crap, ok, ok, I'll change it right now.  Oh Jessie, I can't, I can't take it, I gotta get outta here.

me:   Get the bath!  Get the bath ready!

*husband frantically prepares the bathtub

After cleaning this stuff off of her arms, feet, back and nether regions, all was settled, room was disinfected (again) and the family got back to the business of Allie taming and I soon snuggled down with my freshly minted Stuart.