Ooooh It's a Valentine!

We had a rip-roarin Valentine's Day at the House of Stu.  It didn't start off as planned.  The x-tra special cookies we were going to make, the home-made cards for NannyManda and Daddy--nope, didn't get made.  Instead Monnertown decided on THIS day to wake up early.  She has a sixth sense of the ONLY day Mama can sleep in.

Then came the first hour from hell nap.  Just. Wasn't. Gonna. Go. Down. That. Easy.  But, after a blissful 1.5 hour nap [insert glorious fireworks] what arose from the crib was a happy camper.  We were off. 

Valentines leggings, check. 

Heart-covered fleece jacket, check.

 Grandma,  check. 

Poopy pants, check. Because diapering and dressing a 10-month old isn't harrowing enuff... we gotta add a little stool to the mix.  Monner's Valentine's Day gift to me.  A heart-shaped Monner Turd.

We went to The Wild Rumpus, which is about the best bookstore in the world.   It's Child Heaven.  Hell, it's Mama heaven.  Ferrets, chickens roaming about the store (Monner's fave), Chinchillas, Cockatiels, lizards, spiders and rats that you can watch from a secret window in the floor.  I haven't even yet gotten to the best part, the BOOKS!  We came home with books and a sweet ol 'Rabbit puppet. 

We walked across the street to Twiggs... it sucked, mean ole lady spy-eying us the whole time, 'lest we take our Wheelie Rider and Roll over her toes or Heavens to Mergatroid, steal her shitty lawn ornaments.  So note to this place "MEAN-LADY/No-Man's Land"

We followed the walkway down to the Bibelot, always fun, then it was off to Creative Kidstuff... ooooh yes, toys to share that have served 5 Million children before.  To go, where most have gone before (and stuck in the mouth).  We escaped with only $12 spent and no pesky illness... so far. 

We hit Tilia for lunch.  Just to add insult to injury on our perfect day, the Diaper Lords opened up their joke tins and pulled out the over-used pee-leak gag.  ON my lap.  In the restaurant.  And Yup, we changed. Right then and there, Monner, bare-assed standing up waving at people out the window.  And you know what?  That's PRECISELY what this restaurant needed.  Monner pee don't hurt me. Stuffy old wanna-be's eating their fancy, stupid burgers.  To add to this Lemons-gone-Lemonade luck, we had a clean Onesie on tap that happened to have hearts on it.  Take that A-hole patrons who didn't think my daughter was the best thing to happen in there presumptively-important crappy-ass day.

and now for the evidence--and some pics of Monner and HER valentine... Ethan.

I love deez gyz -- Mama call dem Burgies

Dis mi Valentine Mop

Iz eetz Traynz for Valentines

Dis guy jus kep sleepin... Mama call him Ferretz

Dis my bf Ethan, he take me ridin

He reel good on dis noise klanger too

Ma!  Dis noise klanger!  Les git won!

Things I did Before I Made You

Everybody else is doing it, why shan't I?  I mean my mom said "When you have kids you'll understand!!!" to me, just like everybody else... so, I give you:  "Things I did before I Made You"

1.  Laughed so hard I cried (without peeing a little)

2.  Drank enough to sing.  Out loud.  In public.

3.  I had boyfriends!

4.   I lounged on our Tiki Deck. 

5.  My whole world revolved around these wonderful women.  :)

6.  I snuggled with Daddy!  (So did Elmo?)
 

 

 7.  I wore MINI SKIRTS at 35!

8.  I watched the English Premier League games.  And didn't leave the Pubs during the World Cup.  

9. Spent a lot of time in the gym, hating my body.

10.  Spent a lot of time not know what love was...... 

                      UNTIL

THIS:

11.  We went to the fair and daddy won THIS for you.  I carried it all over the fair for you, brought it on the bus, and have it FOR YOU still.

And I'd do it all again and again... well except for that part about the peeing when I laugh, I still hope that gets better, but if not, know this, you're worth every drop of unwanted pee.  I'd do it again, even knowing about the Neocate poopies, the middle of the night poopies, the crying, the ranting, the bills, all of it.  It's the best.  I love you.

Monner Rock

Do I rock? Moves - check. Sweet outfit - Check. Hair - Check.

I gotz Extrakorikulrz

On Tuesdays I have ma swimmin lessons.  Dis time I went wif ma Dad, but my Mom assists.  It were real fun, we did da motorboat, and I ate some pool water!  Weeeeeeeeeeeeee!  All dis on NO 2nd nap.  And not to much crabbinz.  But I did needs some xtra skups to get me down to sleep for good.  Sometawms i just lik skreemin in ma sleepz, see how fast that ol bat, Mama come runnin, sumtimez she send ma Dad, he a reel big sucka!

So here I am!  Chek me out

Dis rite B4 I hi-fives ma pool pals

!

SuperBowl / Super-Monner

We had a good weekend, despite the Klingon crankiness (thanks teeth!  Jerks.)  and the need to be glued to the Baby Bjorn... which by the way is still invaluable, what to do when (already has) she grows out of it.  Things we do in the Bjorn MonnerCaddie:

• Dishes
• Laundry
• Make da Broccoli Balls ("MonnerBallz" these are her favorite and sooo easy to make - see the jump for instructions - you can do the same thing with Cauliflower - though Monner prefers the Broccoli Balls)
• Cooking of the Pannykooks
• Making appetizers for Superbowl
• Be Awesome
• Do kicks and stretches

Sometimes one has to let the Monner out of the MonnerCaddie for personal reasons, and to climb and nom.

After all that we stayed up until 10:00 p.m., you know, bein awesome naked.  

Dis fireplace look safe enuff

Some say All You Need Is Love...
But allz I need Is Dis Bottle and a GloStik!

I'm Monner and I Know it... Know it... Know it...

She loves this... wait til she hears Kraftwerk!

Best. Birthday. Ever.